Airdirt (ayr’ dirt) - n. A hanging plant that’s been ignored for three weeks or more.

Aquadextrous - adj. Possessing the ability to turn the bathtub faucet on and off with your toes.

Bimp (bimp) - n. A blurry or “double-edged” felt-tip marker.

Carperpetuation (kar’ pur pet u a shun) - n. The act, when vacuuming, of running over a string at least a dozen times, reaching over and picking it up, examining it, then putting it back down to give the vacuum one more chance.

Charp (charp) - n. The green, mutant potato chip found in every bag.

Clunes - n., pl. People who just won’t go.

Magnocartic - n. Any automobile that, when left unattended, attracts shopping carts.

Mozzalastics (maht suh las’ tiks) - n. Large deposits of cheese that stick to the top of the pizza box.

Mustgo - n. Any item of food that has been sitting in the refrigerator so long it has become a science project.

Vegiludes - n. Individual peas or kernels of corn that you end up chasing all over the plate with your fork.

Table Snorkeling (tay’ bul snawrk’ ling) - n. Frantic gesticulations when one bites into hot food and has to take in air to cool it off.

Netsec - n. A Unit of time used in indicating work time lost due to reading net.jokes.

World Wide Wait- The real meaning of WWW.

CGI Joe- A hard-core CGI script programmer with all the social skills and charisma of a plastic action figure.

via: Bert Christensen’s Truth & Humour Pages