Peterson Tuscano has a piece up on a worship service he attended at Greenbelt. A snippet cannot do it justice:
I sat in a shaded spot as the music began. Redman called us to worship. Clap your hands! Shout to the Lord! Dance! He gave lots of instructions and pushed the audience to respond enthusiastically. Like many pop and rock singers do, at one point he called out to the crowd, How is everyone doing? He received a tepid response, so he repeated the question with emphasis. I said, HOW IS EVERYONE DOING? And on cue, the crowd went wild.
As the “worship” continued, a large group of audience members in the center, up towards the front lifted their hands, jumped up and down, and shouted along with the songs (much like I had done for years in the charismatic church services I attended).
But as the crowd cheered, I grew quiet. The more Redman sang and rallied for us to join in the worship, the more I withdrew. I suddenly felt like a stranger speaking a different language. Instead of warming, my insides felt still and cool and distant.
I questioned myself,
Has my heart grown cold to God? Is this because I am gay and I am bold enough I accept this fact? Have I lost my “first love”?
The answers came quickly and confidently. No, I still love to be in God’s presence. I still love to worship. But I no longer need to be ushered to the throne of God like in the past. I no longer need a cheerleader pointing me to Jesus. These past six years, as I sat in silent worship in Quaker meetings, in that stillness, I have found that “hearts unfold like flowers before thee, opening to the Sun above.”
While many other faith bloggers have expressed the same passing of this season in their lives such as IMonk and Darryl Dash, Tuscano spoke past emotion and shallowness and addressed my desire.
I was fortunate growing up to have been able to experience many denominational services because of my music performance.
I was not just subjected to contemporary CCM evangelical styles of worship.
I find my as time passes worship comes in silence, and meditation as I surrender and listen, collectively or singly.
I am drawn toward order, liturgy, tradition and participatory hymns. I have my rare moments where I have raised my hands, crowded the stage; but it is in listening in silence that points me to The Christ, and there is worship.
Like Tuscano, I understand there is a season for everything, and what he describes I have also moved past. That does not negate the people that find worship in this style Tuscano relates at Greenbelt, I don’t mean to imply that. I have moved through the season of the cheerleader and into a place where the tradition of the saints that have gone before and left us their music and their traditions.
worship: reverent honor and homage paid to God: To regard with ardent or adoring esteem or devotion
Me and Jesus songs, lots of noise, shouting,
jumping up and down, raising hands and
acting a certain way.
Repetition has lost it’s appeal, I don’t
need entertainment and I too,
find it like sounding
brass and a tinkling cymbal.
I was thinking about Ecclesiastes 5
1 Guard your steps when you go to the house
of God. Go near to listen rather than to offer the sacrifice of fools, who do not know that they do wrong.
2 Do not be quick with your mouth, do not be hasty in your heart to utter anything before God.
God is in heaven and you are on earth, so let your words be few.
3 As a dream comes when there are many cares, so the speech of a fool when there are many words
My deepest experiences of worship are outside, God’s cathedral.
Published 1 year, 2 months ago
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BD-
An excellent post. I just finished mine for today and I realized as I read this that I was actually heading in the same direction. The other thing I dislike about the “cheerleaders” in local congregational settings is the interminable announcements. Trying to convince people who aren’t interested to attend something that doesn’t strike them as interesting. Rah-rah-go team go!
Barry
Dear BD:
Every Christian worships God in his or her own special way. It allows for our own individual experiences of and with God. Like you said, there will be persons who will enjoy ‘the season of the cheerleader,’ the rowdier types of praise music, and there will be persons who will move past that into… well, what you call the ‘tradition of the saints.’
I think that that participatory praise - i.e., the season of the cheerleader - can be healthy. A joyous praise celebration can be an opportunity to enjoy being part of a church coming together to worship. Cheerleader present or not, praise - the kind that led King David to dance the way he did - of God can be expressed in its most solemn and reverent or exuberantly unrestrained forms.
In the Philippines, it is interesting to note - and I am sure radio requests and sales figures will back me up 100% - that worship music for most evangelical Christians here equals Hillsong Music Australia. While there’s certainly nothing wrong with the music of Hillsong (and its louder spin-off, Hillsong United), there will be those of us in the industry who want to ask: “Don’t you want to hear something else?” (The one time I succeeded in getting “Total Praise” (Avalon) added to our worship roster was for a special number, but, boy, was it something! I praise God for that - the harmonies were straight from heaven.)
I personally am drawn to worship music that finds its excellence in soaring harmonies. Whether it is the Afro-American sound of groups led by Israel Houghton, Kirk Franklin, or Joe Pace, or the sweet vocal harmonies of the men and women of Avalon, Point of Grace, or Take 6, or even the angelic voices of many of the boy’s choirs out there, or the hallowed voices of the Benedictine Monks, as long as there are harmonies, that’s enough for me to focus on the Father. Silence doesn’t work for me; I’m just not at that point at which you are. Maybe I’ll get there in a few years, kinda like how I somehow drifted from Top 40 to Adult Contemporary to CCM Adult Contemporary in a short matter of time.
I guess at the end of the day, whatever music brings us into a state where we can give God, as you put it, ‘ardent or adoring esteem or devotion,’ that’s all that matters. Thanks for the thought-provoking piece and the opportunity to add to the discussion.
Be superblessed!
I think the season of the cheerleader can be healthy for most people too, Ganns.
My season didn’t last long though, I’ve never figured out why. It is interesting and encouraging that so many people are learning the importance of moving through initial influences.
I’ve certainly interviewed my share of CCM types and understood it was just a business, the people involved no different than those in any other genre. Just as tired, just as hard working, just as creative, just as driven, just as bottom line, a bit more subject to censure…
I’m terribly stuffy, I started classical music training when I was six, and grew up learning Bach et al, and didn’t have the time my peers had to immerse myself in contemporary influences. It caused me no end of embarrassment growing up.:^)
If you gave me a choice between Hillsong and The Prayer Cycle for contemporay religious listening choices, I’d last five minutes with Hillsong. I’d play The Prayer Cyle over several times, happily rapturous.
Complex harmonies require a group of people working as one.
That is part of worship to me.
Music choice is subjective, which is why being exposed to the widest variety possible is something to be encouraged.
Silence and stillness bring relationship for me, much like a musical rest is part of it’s whole.
Blog on!
“I’m terribly stuffy, I started classical music training when I was six, and grew up learning Bach et al, and didn’t have the time my peers had to immerse myself in contemporary influences. It caused me no end of embarrassment growing up.:^)”
LOL You remind me of Frasier Crane!
Thanks for this again. ‘Til next post.
arr arrr arrr! Or the hologram doctor in the Star Trek series.:^)
“Please state the nature of the theological emergency”
The Matt Redman stuff I’ve heard over the years tends towards the reflective; I’ve not known his stuff to be get-up-and-dance stuff. He even references indirectly your Ecclesiastes 3 quote in Let My Words Be Few, one of my favorite songs of the praise genre; The Heart of Worship is another rather reflective song.
One of the reasons I’m in a Baptist church at present (one with a music rotation with a charismatic feel, however) is that I’m not a dance-in-the-aisles, everybody-raise-their-hands guy. I may lean towards the charismatic in theology, but am a Baptist stick-in-the-mud (well, a Methodist-raised-turned-Baptist) in temperment. You might be in a similar boat regarding high-octane worship.
Deck 9 doctor, respond at once, I think we have a stuffy person.:^)