Prairie Bible Institute minister/alumnus admits allegedly cyber-stalking PBI abuse survivors

New information has surfaced in the public dispute between Prairie Bible Institute abuse survivors and the PBI alumnus who has threatened to sue them.

It is chilling, it is sad,  and I am posting so that PBI abuse survivors, PBI admin, faculty and students, PBI alumni and others are more fully informed and able to make online decisions in their best interests. Transparency has to be more than an idle word.

Background

On January 25th, PBI alumnus and North Carolina minister Fred Whaples sent a letter of intent to sue to Linda Fossen, spokesperson for a group of Prairie Bible Institute survivors who congregate and chat at what was originally an open Facebook group named We Were Prairie Bible School kids. The group went private in December after considerable  public vitriol from some PBI alumni, and after PBI announced what steps   were being taken to address abuse allegations.

The letter of intent to sue was sent by registered mail to Fossens new address, which had just been registered with the US postal service. In the letter of intent Fred Whaples accused the survivors of defaming his character in posts on FB and demanded that Fossen meet personally with him this week (in Florida) or he would go to directly to the sheriff and file his suit.

The letter of intent can be read in this post, and I encourage PBI alumni to read it in full. The online response in the survivor group was predictable. How would someone banned from a FB group months ago state that ‘current’ Facebook statements would be evidence?

Who would feel a need to give information to someone who was removed for threatening behavior? Who was threatening the safety of so many and jeopardizing the hard work of PBI admin and abuse survivors?

While attempting to find out what postings Whaples was talking about, and ferreting out the supposed mole, the deadline for the demanded ‘mediation’ was approaching.

Why any man who sends a letter of intent to sue would think a woman who has never met him would meet with him alludes me, and I think would concern most people. There is a disturbing lack of boundaries in such a demand which have nothing to do with Matthew 18, or any biblical instruction.  Danger is danger, what an aggressor thinks the bible dictates has nothing to do with a woman  facing that aggressor,  instead of exercising God-given survival skills and common sense.

Another PBI alumnus made the decision to step in and see what could be done. Retired anesthesiologist Dr. John Snyder met with Whaples, and on February 10th let concerned PBI alumni at an open Facebook group know about his initial attempt at mediation.

Behind the Scenes

Dr. Snyder’s mediation FB posting garnered a lot of comments, and confusion and concern was expressed.  Fortunately no one shot the messenger. Anyone who had read the Whaples letter of intent could see  discrepancies such as FB postings alleged in the letter of intent essentially becoming a non-issue.  The ‘dispute’ became about spokesperson Linda Fossen and Whaples, and yet in point 4, the Whaples legal team would contact abuse survivors if Fossen didn’t meet the demand for a face to face with Fred Whaples.

Snyder carefully and graciously reached out to Linda Fossen as he said he would that same night.

Fred’s primary concern is with what I’ll choose to call your “character assassination” of him, with emailing his family, emailing his coworkers at the church, emailing pastors in the Concord area and emailing the denomination leadership. Fred stated that he needs to have this email campaign of character assassination stopped, he needs what he views as the untruths to be retracted and he needs an apology in as public a fashion as the character assassination has been.

Snyder outlined what he had heard Whaples express as needs. It is clear words such as assassination were not used lightly, and Snyder volunteered his assistance to Fossen  as mediator to assist in preventing Whaples from filing a lawsuit and hampering her ability to support the survivors of the We Were…group.

Whaples character assassination accusations had changed –   from a group of survivors to Linda Fossen, from Facebook to emails. It appears that in the three-hour meeting Whaples did not present his fellow alumnus with any of the supposed statements made about him. In other words, evidence. Fossen got back to mediator Snyder quickly.

I have never emailed or had any verbal or written contact with a single member of Fred’s family.

I have never emailed or had any verbal or written contact with a single member of Fred’s church, staff or members.

I have never emailed or had any verbal or written contact with a pastor in the Concord area.

I have never emailed or had any verbal or written contact with the Church of God denomination with the exception of Fred’s superior, the Dr. Rev. Michael Hone whom I spoke with on the telephone on February 6, 2012. I may have inadvertently talked to a pastor when I made 2-3 phone calls to the Church of God in order to find out to whom I should report my complaint to. I reported Fred for behavior that was unbecoming a pastor and have followed up with written documentation about my complaint.

There is more in the Fossen response, outlining the toll  on the PBI abuse survivor group and the toll taken on Fossen personally. She told Snyder that Whaples had given her cell phone number to his attorney, a number she doesn’t give out. She made it clear that she and others understand Whaples has been the aggressor and stated what she did to after receiving the letter of intent to sue.

Once the letter of intent to sue was received, I tried twice to speak with Fred on the telephone and he hung up on me before I was even able to get out my name. I sent him two emails to his FB and one to his personal email, which he did not respond to. He has refused to respond to my request to retract the inaccurate accusations against me. He continues to speak about these accusations in public formats on Facebook and in conversations with other alumni.

Fossen was clear about what she needed, as is necessary when dealing with a mediator. She wants proof of the supposed emails with headers, and wants Whaples not to contact survivors or her. In her earlier requested written response to Whaples, Fossen was clear she would contact his denominational supervisor.

She has reported Whaples to the Concord PD and has made PBI President Mark Maxwell and Dr. Mollering ( independent 3rd party chosen by PBI) of Centre Street Church aware of what is occurring. PBI alumni in the open FB group were informed the alleged cyber-stalker had identified himself. Whaples wasn’t named.

It turns out Fred Whaples has been reading the We Were…closed FB page since he was banned in November.

Whaples has been reported to Facebook as being in violation of their safety policy and terms.

How does anyone know Whaples has been accessing the closed group? A few days ago he told Snyder that he read Snyder’s mediation recommendations on the We Were…page.

Snyder asks Whaples to be clear about apologizing, and attempts to explain how threatening his cyber-spying is and has been to survivors,  and  how threatening Whaples contact was with a couple of the group members and how that contact is flaunting. Well hello, Whaples would know he was harming others while reading the FB group, and he kept on anyway.  In a final request Dr. Snyder asks Whaples if he is still reading the closed We Were…FB group. He got a yes.

Dr. Snyder has wisely withdrawn as a mediator.

Linda Fossen remains concerned and scared. Group members are shaken. Fossen wrote this in response to a couple of questions I asked about how Fred Whaples could access a closed FB group.

It was not until John’s email exchange with Fred that Fred admitted to accessing the site. We knew he was getting updates on our postings and we went through out membership list at least 15 times trying to verify that each member was who they said they were and we constantly reminded our members not to share information outside the group.

Fred succeeded in turning us into cannibals who were mistrustful of each other as we went through months of trying to figure out who the mole was. We had always assumed that a mole was feeding him information – we had no idea he was personally accessing the site.

And this:

I have to clear my name because many people believe what he (Whaples) has said about me doing this and it makes me look like a vindictive person out to destroy Fred. I need to be able to refute these accusations. It must be done publicly because he has made them public.

The full documentation is up at the closed group. First,  PBI abuse survivors need to be fully informed. Trust has been damaged or destroyed between members of the group, their spokesperson and with others. Secondly, it is critical PBI alumni who value transparency know the effort of Dr. Snyder (and others) to get to the truth, so that people can make informed relational decisions.
Lastly is important the outer circle of supporters and the public are aware of what occurred and what steps have been taken.

Whaples issued an odd and blindly incomplete apology to the We Were…group on February 13th.

I want to reiterate my sincere regret for offending any of you back in November with my use of scripture in such a way that it was hurtful. I am guilty of speaking before listening far too often in my life and this particularly showed itself the three days I spent with you in November of last year. Would you please again accept my apology for not listening. I want healing and restoration for all of you. I want you all to experience safety and peace. While Linda and I will remain in conflict due to her activity on and off line against me this has nothing to do with you. For this reason, I hereby give you my word, my promise, my absolute guarentee that I will no longer be viewing material from your site. I have taken steps to delete my access to your site and want you all to have the established place of healing you so rightfully deserve. May God bless you. You are welcome to contact me with any questions or comments if it will assist in moving forward. –Fred Whaples—

As stated earlier, this is now in the hands of authorities. I am told PBI President Mark Maxwell and Dr. Mollering of Centre Street Church have spoken to Whaples about his behavior. I’ve written both to ask for confirmation and will post their yes or no. (Centre Street Church – yes – BD)

If Fred Whaples wants to proceed with his lawsuit against Linda Fossen and PBI abuse survivors he remains free to do so.

There are two twists. Dr. John Snyder is the brother of the PBI lawyer. Ruth Maxwell, sister of PBI President Mark Maxwell, spoke at Fred Whaples church in January. At the end of the day PBI is a small college community, and for all the talk of thousands of alumni, the actions of one or two affect many.  In that regard, aggressiveness, (alleged) cyber-stalking and spying and threats have to be named for what they are, and the behavior has to be named for what it is – abusive.

If Whaples chooses to sue, US courts make information public and this would would all come out anyway.

I encourage  PBI alumni and staff who want to see the full mediation correspondence/documentation to date to contact Linda Fossen.  (The relevant part of the mediation has also been posted on the FB group Prairie Bible College Alumni and Current Students 16/02/12 – BD deleted by FB admins. The exchange can be found at Linda Fossen’s website)  While it has been posted in full at the We Were…FB group, I’m holding back here out of respect for behind the scenes peacemakers.  I know there is a genuine concern that my posting deeper mediation background correspondence will be perceived as malicious or vindictive. I’ll respect that.

Update: A point was made in the comment section of this article updating this dispute that Fred Whaples has not formally or legally admitted to cyber-stalking.  I  have erred by not placing the term alleged in front of the term (it doesn’t matter what I think about behavior, legal definitions rule). I have added  allegedly and alleged in italics above, to donate the lack of doing so sooner.